The Cirque's Theme Song
by Candra 'wolfgal97
Summary: Darren and Evra put on a little proformance for our favorite vampire! What happens? Read to find out! Comments are welcome.
1. Chapter 1

Hi! Its wolfgal97! This is my first fic, and I wanted to try something funny so if I messed up, it wouldn't be too bad. My friend helped me come up with the idea, and I did the lyrics. She loves Evra because I got her hooked to the series. (sorry neonXskittlez!) Teen rated to be safe...Ahem! Disclaimer!

**I am not Darren Shan and don't own the series. If I did, a certain favorite character of mine wouldn't have died! (sobs quietly in the corner) OK! On with the fic!**

"Hey, Mr. Crepsley!" Darren Shan comes running all out to see me, his best friend, Evra, trailing behind him. Darren was beaming about something and pulled to a stop as Evra came puffing in, out of breath.

"Mr. Crepsley, guess what! We heard an awesome song on the radio, and we think it would make a great theme song for the Cirque," my assistant explained.

"Yes, and," I ask warily. Something is up with these two...

The snake boy, who had finally caught his breath, piped up. "So we fixed it up and now, we want you to hear it!" Oh NO.

"Well, what was the original song," I inquire, preparing myself for the worst. Probably a nursery rhyme.

"Take It Off, by Kesha," they howl at the same time.

Oh my word, no! "Erm... I am a bit preoccupied with taking care of Madam Octa..."

"No you're not, that's my job," Darren exclaimed. Charna's Guts! "Ok, but make it fast. I got a lot of work to do tonight," I snap.

Both boys beam at me, and then break out in song...

* * *

Both:There's a place downtown where the freaks all come around

It's a hole in the wall, it's a creepy free for all

Evra: When the dark of the night

Comes around that's the time

That the animal comes alive

Looking for something wild

Darren: N-now we lookin' like freaks in my gold coffin

Got a water bottle full of blood in my cape pocket

Got my sun screen on, So I won't regret it in the mornin'

But tonight, I don't give a, I don't give a, I don't give a...

Both: There's a place downtown where the freaks all come around

It's a hole in the wall, it's a creepy free for all

And they creep me out, when they get on stage

When they get on stage, everybody watch the stage.

There's a place I know if you're looking for a show

Where they go hardcore and there's snake-men galore

And they creep me out, when they get on stage

When they get on stage, everybody watch the stage

Darren: Lose your mind, lose it now

Lose your sanity in the crowd

We're delirious, tear it down

'Til the sun comes back around

(Darren has scared face)

Evra: Now we're getting so snake, knocking over the wolf man

E'erbody eatin' popcorn, it's a filthy hot mess

Gonna get freaked, I'm not the Cirques owner,

So I don't give a, I don't give a, I don't give a

Both: There's a place downtown where the freaks all come around

It's a hole in the wall, it's a creepy free for all

And they creep me out, when they get on stage

When they get on stage, everybody watch the stage

There's a place I know if you're looking for a show

Where they go hardcore and there's snake-men galore

And they creep me out, when they get on stage When they get on stage, everybody watch the stage

(Ohhhh Ohhh Ohhhh's)...

* * *

The two boys finished with an attempt at a herky (AN: cheerleader jump) that only Evra completes without doing the splits with a , Tada!, look.

Larten stands there, with a shocked look on his face. All of a sudden, the vampire breaks out in a totally rare laughing fit! He doubles over with laughter, howling things like, "That would scare the audience more than the show itself," and,"I think I shall need therapy after that! Get Dr. Phil!"

When he calmed down, he gave the singers a look and said, "for your own sake, you better not ever sing that again!"

Little did he know that Mr. Tall gave them the OK for singing it at that nights show...


	2. Chapter 2

**Second chapter! I didn't know if I should continue this, but im gonna give it a go! "Arra!"**

***hands the vampiress a peace of paper" **

**"you want me to read this! Oh fine! Wolfgal doesn't own the series, if she did, I wouldn't exist! Happy?" *Wolfgal grins like a chessur cat on lithium***

"Ladies and gentlemen, I, Mr. Tall, would like to cordually thank you for coming to the cirque. Beware! We cannot garentee your safty, but we will promise to excite and amaze you! We first have a duet group to put us in the mood for our show! Please enjoy our very own Evra & Darren!," Mr. Tall said to the crowd. He had that creepy knowing grin splashed on his face. The kind that says,"I know it was you in the cookie jar!"

The lights dimmed and a spot light came on center forward stage. A hush came over the sizable crowed as the two singers came on stage. Before, they had been confident and sure, but now it was as if a random vacuum came along and sucked all the confidence. Darren was even pailer than normal, and Evra was trembling as he turnd a puke, green apart from his normal dark green shade. All in all, they looked like the straingest pair of kindergardners experiencing their first fire drill.

The music kicked on, and both boys gulped for air. They started off shaky, and the crowd looked stuned! Mr. Tall glanced to the corner of the room to see Larten Crepsley, palefaced and mournful lookinkg. What is he doing? He was creeping to the very back of the audience at a pace only a vampire can pull off so smoothly.

The boys were on the first chorus by the time the red-clad vampire had sat down in a lone seat in the back of the room. He looked uncomfortable, but resigned to somethng. What is he up to?

Evra was doing his final solo and was now comfortble. Darren has also calmed dow and they both look like they are enjoying this. Mr. Tall knew this would go to their big teenage heads. Nothing a few extra chores wont cure, Mr. Tall smirked.

Finally, the boys pulled the much-practiced herky, and succeeded in not falling on their butts. They had the Tada Look on their face. They obviously were proud, but were nervious about the audiences reaction, who looked like they had just been told that they were going to be to Evra's snake. The boys smile faided...

**Oh no! What's going to happen to Darren and Evra? Whats Larten doing in the back of the room? Why is Mr. Tall always awsome? We'll what are you askin me for? I don't know!Yet...**

**We probably will never know the last one... Kinda-sorta-very short. Sorry! Be kind!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Last chapter! Yes, something for you to be happy about! Im going to wrap this up as best as I can. Thank you all so much for the nice comments! Slight spoil for the saga of Larten Crepsley. Not too big. It won't effect the story. **

**If I was Darren Shan, I would not only be discracing myself with this, but I would be a guy! Got that? Was the good enough for you guys? *people nod***

* * *

Confidence gone again! No one has said anything for a few long moments. Or was it a few hours? Days? Suddenly, a clapping sound came from the back of the room. It was clapping! And cheering! From one, lone, scared, orange-haired vampire.

Darren and Evra couldn't see over the crowd of now wildly applauding crowed! Larten smiled wryly. He had done his job. Again! Gosh! How many times does he have to save that brat? The one who had weaseled his way into a soft spot in the older vampires heart?

Larten made his way to back stage for his performance. Darren and Evra took their bows and then went off stage to the after party that would commence after show. They were grinning so hard that it looked fake like a barbie doll. Evra had a purple blush gracing his cheeks.

The show ended smoothly and the friendly freaks went to the after party as the people went home. It was about 12 at night, but hey, that's when vampires party best! All but one...

Darren was enjoying the attention he was getting. Many freaks had gathered to congratulate Evra and him, who was now looking for Darren after being separated from him. "Have you seen Mr. Crepsley," the snake boy asked his friend. "No. He's probably off brooding somewhere."

"Do not be so quick to judge, Master Shan," came the knowing voice of Mr. Tall. "Your mentor cares more about you then you think. He even watched your performance at the show tonight." Darren looked shocked! "But I thought he hated it."

"Yes, but he cares about you more. He was even the first to applaud for you." At this, Darren felt warm inside. He always thought his mentor didn't really care. After all, he's just an assistant. Replaceable...

"Were..." Darren started, but was interrupted. "In his trailer," came the Cirque's owners reply. And then he started off in that direction. When he got to the door, he hesitated in knocking, but did after a few breaths. "Come in!"

Darren entered the room, that had a theme of red and black. "Ah, the star himself, come to greet the lowly vampire," came the sarcastic greeting that basically meant "hey," which is what Darren said.

"Well, what do you want, young Shan? I have not got all night."

"Thank you," Darren crocked, his voice thick with emotion. The, he gave the tall vampire a hug. Larten didn't respond for a moment. Darren thought he might have crossed a line and started to pull away, but strong arms pressed him to their owners chest. You see, Larten had not been shown such affection in over one hundred years. He had forgotten how good it felt...

"Thank _YOU_ Darren. Your are a wonderful assistant, and a good friend." Truth be told, Darren was more than a friend. He was like the son Larten could never have. The cousin he had lost...

"Thanks Mr. Crepsley. I don't know what I'd do without you. You're a really good mentor." Darren was alone other than Mr. Crepsley. He'd also become a father figure to him. Darren couldn't imagine his life any other way.

"I'm gonna go back to the party now. Will you come with me?" Darren's child like eyes shinned up into Larten's emerald eyes. "Very well," came the gentle sigh. Darren beamed like it was Christmas and he was told he was getting a car. "Darren?"

"Yeah, Mr. Crepsley?"

"If you _EVER_ tell what happened at the show tonight to any vampire, _ESPECIALLY_ Gavner, I will personally beat you to a pulp, have Arra throw you of the top of the bars, throw you into the halls of Death, and feed you to the wolves and Debbie. Do you understand?" His tone was deathly serious, his face slightly betrayed him. "No, NOT DEBBIE!" Larten nodded solemnly as vampire and assistant went off for some non-violent partying. Both, unknowing to the eavesdropping Evra behind the tent...who was now smirking, thinking of ways to blackmail Darren into doing his chores a few days...

**

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It's over! *random dancing and partying for 5...4...3...2...* Ok, sanity is back. Sorry! Kinda mushy end but I wanted a father/son moment! Bad Evra, you! But we love him anyway. Please comment! I need encouragement to post my non-contest Halloween fic. Thanks for sticking with me through this mass of insanity! Sorry for my baaaad spelling!


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